How many years you’ve been in practice: 1.5
Where ARE you? New York, NY
What your biggest obstacle about money was before taking Lean In. MAKE BANK.?
Unconscious shame and guilt about WANTING and HAVING money, love, anything really. I grew up in poverty in Russia, and was constantly told not to ask for anything, and shamed when I did. This (among other things) resulted in the unconscious belief that wanting to make MONEY was also shameful — outwardly I’d say that I wanted it, but I was unconsciously recreating the poverty of my childhood by taking very low fees (I’m talking $25/session) thinking that that’s better than nothing. And while that’s true, it also created the situation where I was working super hard but winding up with a $12 balance at the end of every month. However, I didn’t KNOW that that was my biggest obstacle until I got myself into the program and opened it all up.
What was your biggest win with LIMB? Learning to state my full fee ($200/session) with complete confidence when a new client calls, and being comfortable with trusting myself to handle the conversation that ensues. As a result, SEVERAL people who have called, simply said “Okay, I’ll bring my credit card”, and that was that! But on a deeper, more subtle level, this came from having shaken off the shame about wanting and having things (including money) and thus not feeling like a greedy monster for asking for my full fee.
What is your weirdest trait? I am crazy for classical music and opera and know almost no mainstream music at all.
What do you do for fun? I am an artist and when I have the time, I paint.
What would someone be surprised to learn about you? For many years, I was a self-taught classical soprano and have sung twice at Carnegie Hall.
Your favorite animal? Dolphins
Favorite Color? Blue-green
Favorite Dessert? Chocolate Coconut Ice cream (the non-dairy stuff!)
Why do you think it’s essential that therapists work out their money shit?
Aside from the fact that this is how we make a living and need to get really clear on our money issues, our clients also have money issues and the more we know about our own stuff with money, the easier it is to see our clients’.
But on a deeper level, money is symbolic of SO much — survival, the basic building blocks of safety, etc. This is why dealing with money issues goes SO deep — for me it went back to being a 4-year-old wanting to get
candy that was “too expensive”, stealing money from my mom’s purse, and feeling ashamed for wanting and needing (and more). Dealing with our money issues has implications for all levels of issues around love, belonging, acceptance, which is why it’s so important to deal with, as soon as possible in one’s career.
What are you most excited about when it comes to coaching the next cohort of Lean In. MAKE BANK?
I am so excited to be able to share my experience with the next cohort because I know how deeply this stuff goes and I really want to help people recognize that for themselves. Unearthing all this stuff ultimately creates much more freedom in life, and I am so excited that people are willing to show up for themselves and work on this stuff. I am a great support and I’m also great at encouraging people to dig deeper because I know how much impact this has on one’s inner and outer life — both in terms of money and in a bigger sense, as well.